Love addiction
men and women who love too much
Introduction: What does it mean when a man or woman loves too much?
At first glance, it might sound strange to say that someone loves too much, but there are plenty of people who do. Love is about giving of yourself, but it is not about allowing yourself to be abused by your partner for the sake of love. That’s what loving too much is: ending up hurting yourself for the sake of love.
What’s more, it’s a situation that’s widespread enough to have a name: love addiction.
The term “love addiction” is used to describe a person who has an obsessive, compulsive or addictive relationship with love. It is often used to describe women who are unable to control their feelings and emotions for a man.
Love addiction can be seen as a form of emotional dependency that can lead to other mental health problems such as depression and anxiety.
Women are originally said to be more loving than a man and too much of this trait can lead to love addiction. But love addiction is not exclusively the preserve of women, there are plenty of men who also exhibit the same type of behaviour.
Love addiction is closely related to codependency. A person may believe they cannot be loved because they are not worthy of love. This self-talk causes the individual to act in a way that does not allow someone else to love them, which then makes them feel unloved and unworthy. This phenomenon is called self-fulfilling prophecy.
Causes of love addiction: What causes men and women to love too much?
Love addiction is a condition characterized by an obsessive preoccupation with romantic love. It is also known as Clerambault’s syndrome or delusional love.
The causes of love addiction are not yet fully understood. Some experts believe it may be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain or childhood trauma, others believe it may be caused by a combination of these factors. Some people who suffer from love addiction may also experience erotomania, which is a condition in which the person believes that someone else (usually a celebrity) is in love with them and wants to be with them.
Love addiction is thought to be a possible effect of feelings such as rejection and abandonment, inadequacy, betrayal or shame. It is also thought to be rooted in people’s inability to be content in intimate relationships. Love addicts in relationships will often do everything they can to please the other person, even if it means neglecting themselves. In this state, love addicts may feel out of control and ashamed of the way they feel at the time.
When love addiction exists, people may not be able to function normally without the approval of their partner or parents. For example, they may constantly have to make sure they are good enough and behave in a certain way to please their partner. In extreme cases, love addicts may neglect their physical health, job, school, studies, finances or even relationships and friendships in favour of a partner.
In other words, love addiction is a complex feeling of unfulfilment that stems from feelings of inadequacy and shame. In people who are in relationships with love addicts, their partners will often be aware of the problem, but will try to deny and ignore it. This can be an extremely difficult situation for a partner to cope with, because they cannot force the other person to get help if that person is unaware that they have a problem or does not want to get help.
Love addiction is a combination of feelings such as:
- anxiety
- fear
- despair
- anticipation
- hope
- a sense of needing to be “loved”
- a need for attention that is not received by others in a healthy way.
Symptoms of love addiction: How to recognize if you are a man or woman who loves too much
Love addiction is not a mental illness and is not considered a disorder in the DSM-5. It can manifest in a wide range of behaviors, from excessive texting or calling to intrusive social media use, compulsive spending, risky sexual behavior, and substance abuse.
A person struggling with love addiction can feel empty inside because they are never satisfied with their current relationships or the love they receive. And this emptiness is what she seeks to fill with an endless cycle of one-sided, unrequited love. Chasing this fantasy gives a sense of false happiness that often leads to heartbreak and disappointment, and ultimately to even more emptiness.
Some of the most common symptoms in love addicts are as follows:
- difficulty maintaining healthy relationships
- may feel anxious or depressed when not in a relationship
- separation anxiety
- difficulty concentrating on other things, such as work, friends or family
- use and even abuse social networks to find romantic partners or new relationships
- catastrophizing the end of a relationship
- a tendency to seek their partner’s approval
- difficulty maintaining relationships because of fear of loss
- intense fears of abandonment or partner disapproval
- tendency to seek control and predictability. At the same time, they obviously have difficulty relinquishing control and find it extremely difficult to manage change.
- fear that others will not fulfil their promises, responsibilities, etc.
- intense fears of death, loss, grief (e.g. fear of falling)
- gets easily frustrated if plans do not go as planned
- difficulty setting limits or keeping promises (e.g. difficulty saying no)
- fears failure because of the expectations they have to meet
- difficulty adjusting plans if life changes without warning (e.g. job loss, child birth, divorce, and so on)
- may have difficulty seeing the big picture and making plans because they are too focused on the current situation
- when asked to make a plan, they focus on what is not going well in their life right now. They may not be able to see the positive aspects of a distant future or prioritize the needs of daily life over the more important ones that may arise later.
- they may also not be able to express what they need in a situation (for example, they may want more time with their child but don’t know how to ask for it).
How to stop loving too much and find happiness in your life?
We are all born with a natural instinct to love. But sometimes we can love too much and this can make it difficult to find happiness in our lives. Love is a powerful emotion that can cause great joy, but terrible pain if it is not reciprocated. . It is a powerful feeling that can make a person hopeful, but it can also be one of the most crippling feelings possible. Love can make people act in ways they normally wouldn’t, such as falling in love with someone who is completely wrong for them. Or it could lead someone to stay in a relationship that was harmful to them, even when they would have otherwise run away. Love can make people feel worth the effort, even when the relationship isn’t a positive one.
They may feel they can’t function without some kind of attachment, or they may simply be afraid of being alone. Love can make people feel valuable, even when the relationship is not positive. The best antidote for love addiction – or whatever specific addiction you’re currently suffering from – is to talk about the problem with a psychotherapist.
If you’re constantly putting other people’s needs before your own, you won’t be able to give them the care and attention they need. You need to make a priority of yourself, even if it sounds cliché. Many people have no idea how to prioritize themselves.
We can’t expect fruitful relationships in life without failure if there is no pain. But this failure and pain should not be the thing we focus on most. Failure is a process of finding true value and meaning in life, and pain is a process of change. If you can’t process the situation or see value in it, you won’t be able to get out of it. We shouldn’t be too afraid of failure and pain because they are an indispensable part of life. The only way to see the value in failure is through pain and processing it. If we are too afraid of these things, they will continue to manifest in our lives. We should try to be receptive and open so that we can adjust to what happens to us.
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